Well ladies and gents, it’s Saturday once again. Amazing, I know because this week… gosh this whole summer… came and left me before I could even sit down and think what to do!! Now who am I supposed to complain to about that?!! I’m kinda cheesed if you can’t already tell. Summers used to be a sacred time to me as a youngin. Now that I’m a grown man who can truly appreciate the dog days of the year, summers nowadays ain’t worth a diddly-doo compared to the summers I used enjoy as a kid. Back then summers went on forever and a week or two extra. And now?! Now a fella can’t hardly even get their beach jammies on and the vacation planned before Halloween comes a knockin’. And it’s not just the summers that are shrinking either. There’s a big stink in the news these days about how the cost-cutters have mangled the iconic Big Mac to the point that it’s only a pittence of its former glory. Geez, you’d almost be lying to even call it a mini-mac anymore. I stopped at McDonalds the other day and ordered myself a large (LARGE!) milkshake only to get what would’ve been a medium shake just a few years ago. Sure glad I didn’t order the small milkshake. I’d have felt silly drinking a milkshake out of a sippy cup.
So I’m forced to ask, is everything shrinking anymore?????!! Am I the unwitting victim of economics and capitalism gone amuck? I shudder to think what’s next. Probably not me for I’m one of the few things in this universe that seems impermeable to shrinking. Go figure.